The Lion Sleeps tonight - Nothing on TV

By the second day at Figtree camp our new river had acquired a couple of hippos that came ashore right below my tent. The roads, if you can call them that, were still rivers of mud and all the land rovers get stuck every few minutes. The Masai have developed a method of extricating the vehicles that might prove useful in Canada.

First they spin the wheels until the car is buried in mud up to the floor boards. When the vehicle is totally immobile they wait till another landrover comes by. The 2nd land rover assess the situation then pulls up about 20 feet behind the first vehicle, guns the engine, puts the car in gear and rams the stuck vehicle thereby extricating it from the mud and assuring all in the first vehicle whiplash. Of course in the process it becomes stuck itself. Not to worry though, because in a few minutes another landrover will arrive and the process continues all day till darkness falls or they run out of land rovers. The secret is not to be the last landrover of the day or you might have to spend the night in the mud hole.

From the 2nd day I was assigned to a vehicle with two French couples who seemed totally oblivious to the game drives. They just sat in the back of the vehicle and talked to each other at the top of their lungs. Nothing seemed to interest them. I know I tried:
“Look There’s an elephant!”
Nothing
“Over there! A lion.
Nothing.
“Look coming out of the trees - A Tyrannosaurs Rex!!!!!
A bored gaulic glance.

Every one here seems to feel there trip is not a success unless they’ve seen the “Big Five” which is not to be confused with the “High Five” which is something totally different. The big five are the Lion, The Rhino, the Leopard, Elephant, and Buffalo. The most difficult to see are the Rhino of which there only about 46 Black Rhinos in all of Kenya, so there are tough to find. The leopard likes it’s privacy and is difficult to spot. The others are basically a dime a dozen and not too difficult to spot.

On the 2nd day we spotted a leopard - or rather he spotted us. He burst out of the brush roaring at us and took off. We tried later in the day to find him, and on the 3rd day as well but no luck. However on the last day another group had spotted him and we rushed to the spot to find a parking lot full of landrovers. As many of the occupants were French our two couples began a soiree at the top of their lungs. I was the only one looking, and finally spotted the leopard in a small cave in the river embakement. I could just make out his head and ears and settled in to wait. I figured he’d try and slink out and get away. I wasn’t expecting what happened next.

The leopard tired of listening to the French babble coming from the landrovers literally exploded from the cave and roarig at the top of his lungs charged the landrover. Believe it or not that seemed to get the French couples attention. I barely had time to drop my binoculars grab my camera and shoot blind before the leopard, turned at the last moment and streaked away. By some pure chance I got a great shot. Everyone else was too shocked to do anything.
g the obnoxious French couples) visited a Masai village. For the first bit it seemed pretty exciting. A few of us (includining, we were met by son of the chief and all the women in the village danced for us, then the men did as well. Then we were led through gate where the bazaar was set up. Entertainment is over, business time now. We also got to go inside one of their homes. If you saw the “Bridge Over the River Kwai” and remember the box they locked Alec Guinness in - well that was a luxury condo. And if you’re cool, just throw another piece of dung on the fire.

On the last day we saw over 30 lions doing everything from eating, defecating and mating, and of course I have pictures of all of the above. The mating is very much like humans. The mail climbs on top of the female, bites her ear does his thing, and then she says she has a headache, bats him off of her and they both go to sleep.

On the last drive of the last day, our Masai guide, William and I, stood looking over the African Savannah.
“What is Canada like?” William asked me.
“Our prairies look very much like this.” I told him.” Mostly flat with gentle rolling hills.”
“Are there Lions in Canada” William asked me.
“No.” I said.
“I don’t think I could live somewhere where there weren’t Lions.” He sad sadly.
“I know how you feel.” I replied. “I don’t think I can live somewhere without cable.”